Back to Basics: Walnut Paddle by Sporkwood Review

Manufacturer: Sporkwood
Material: Walnut wood
Paddle Length: 7″
Handle Length: 5″
Total Length: 12″
Width: 3″
Thickness: 1″
Purchase at: Sporkwood $19.99 15% off with code KRISSY during checkout

This paddle by Sporkwood is gorgeous, affordable, and quite functional which makes it a triple threat of awesome. The walnut that it is made from gives it a nice heavy thud and its amazing good looks. There are a few minor cosmetic issues, but that’s the nature of working with natural materials, so I am not at all concerned about them. They don’t impact the usefulness of this at all. Go buy this. It is absolutely worth it. It’s worth it at double the price.

I normally prefer bigger paddles than this one, but there is something about the dense wood and thickness that makes this a thuddy beast despite its small size. It’s a bit on the stingy side of thuddy, but it’s still very much a thuddy paddle. I prefer thuddy simply because we can play longer and harder before I am done.

Thuddy sensations are deeper muscle pain rather than the sharp, biting pain of stingy. Thuddy doesn’t make marks as well as stingy, but most people find it easier to handle. I am not a huge masochist, but rather a sub (read: brat) to a sadist, so I want to please (read: I want to mouth off while pleasing). Thuddy is our happy medium.

Most toys that you will find in sex toy stores are stingy. They are light weight and thin. Thuddy only comes from big, thick, and/or heavy. This paddle is two of the three which is why it is a tad stingier than I normally go for. I am actually really pleased with it because I am challenged by it without it being overwhelming. It’s the right balance of mean without being too mean.

The handle on this may be a tad thick for petite hands, but for us it was comfortable. The handle flares out which makes it a lot more secure in the hand. The two sides are cut at slightly different angles, but this is for ergonomics and it is more comfortable around the thumb for holding. I was rather impressed with this, and His Eminence Lord Holiness Dom Pants loved the flare. It makes the paddle stay in the hand better even when there is sweat.

Because this is so thick, I don’t really worry about breaking this. I mean it could happen, but you’d have to really be trying. Unless there is some unseen flaw in the wood at the crucial thin handle area, but even then, that’s a really big if. This is a solid, well made paddle that can take (give) a beating. i know; we’ve tried it.

The only flaw in this that I can find is that the wax coat isn’t even. There are two spots, one on the handle and one on the paddle, where the wax was thinner than the rest of it. This makes those spots not as smooth as the rest. This does not in anyway impact the use of this paddle at all. It’s a cosmetic issue. Plus, it is one that is easily solved by just adding another coat of wax. No big deal. Waxing your toys is a good way to maintain them over time anyway. Just like expensive furniture.

Speaking of maintaining, this paddle should be treated like expensive furniture. Don’t get it wet or leave it wet. You can wipe it down with a damp cloth to clean it, but don’t wash it in water. Wood doesn’t like water. Store it in a cool, dry place out of direct sunlight, and you will be bequeathing this to your traumatized offspring in your will.