I had a good day today. I wasn’t expecting good days for awhile. Good days were going to be a thing to look forward to. Good days were a goal to strive for.
My good day was due to simple things. Laughter with friends. Feeling like a part of a community. Penis shaped lollipops.
Mostly my good day came from the love of a good man that has stood by me through some of the hardest months of my adult life.
I napped today on Dom Pants chest while he quietly talked to a friend of ours. His heart beat and deep voice soothed me to sleep. I felt safe and content. He stayed there long past when he wanted to because it made me happy to have him there.
Later we talked about the near future for us, our relationship, and our dynamic. In that moment, I got to see a man that truly adored me. He was excited about having space for us even if it is only for a short time. He shared some of his plans for deepening our dynamic and exploring things that he had felt that he couldn’t due to my soon to be ex husband’s vanilla predilections and poor communication skills.
Finally, there was the sex. It felt so good to see the desire on his face. He found me beautiful and sexy. He wanted me. Fucking me made him grin. There was no other place he wanted to be or other person he wanted to be with in that moment.
I realized I am enjoying sex more since the decision to divorce was made. There’s no guilt, shame, or embarrassment with Dom Pants. I am exactly the thing he wants. I can be in that moment with him. There isn’t the worry of disturbing or creeping out my soon to be ex. We are more authentic to ourselves, relationship, and each other because we aren’t tip toeing around someone else who won’t voice their issues.
Today was a window to the future for us. I like how it looks.
This post first appeared at http://krissynovacaine.weebly.com/blog/bliss